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If Everything Goes Through, Life Will Be Perfect.

How is it, that this morning, I was feeling so completely hopeless? And now, I feel so completely hopeful that I might explode from the excitement of new possibilities? This morning, I was so overwhelmed. I hated my job; I was scared for financial security. Aren't I supposed to not have to worry about that until I'm at least legal age, or something? Anyway, I was also mortified of the possibility of being completely screwed out of going to Pharmacy School. Yet again, because of money. This morning, my boss was just telling me to be at work by 8 a.m. on Thanksgiving Day. Lame-O.

This afternoon, I talked to my school counselor for an hour about what steps I need to take now to get into Pharmacy School in the fall. I've been so worried that a puny 25 on my ACT just wasn't going to cut the mustard. My counselor informed me today that a 25 paired with my 3.92 G.P.A. and my class rank of 4 is enough to get me into pre-pharm, and possibly to get me through it for only the cost of books and food. Was that a surprise?

You bet your ass. I nearly died when she told me. Died, I tell you. That is so mind-blowingly great, something has to go wrong now. I mean, it doesn't make sense that it could play out like that. That means I will hate it. Hate it with a red fiery passion. Right?

I just got home from going by The Cow to ask for my old waitressing job back. You know the one I'm talking about. The one I loved with a red fiery passion? The one where I could make $15 an hour on a good night? The one with the crazy bitch assistant manager that liked to harass little girls? Yeah, that one. The crazy assistant manager got fired for, guess what? Stealing, which is like dishonesty. Guess what? She's a crazy dishonest person. Who knew she was dishonest? Other than me, and everyone else that worked there.

Maybe now, things will all start to work out :)

The Pertinence of Pie

Thanksgiving is a time for people to give thanks for the important things in their lives such as friends, family, career, love, health, good fortune and food. Without these things, life is meaningless. My let's-smoke-pot-and-get-pregnant-so-we-can-be-cool school decided to make a scrumptious holiday dinner for students and family to all get together and have some food. I would say good food, but who am I kidding? Cafeteria food is still cafeteria food. Not that I'm complaining. Who can bring themselves to complain when we had pie? At let's-smoke-pot-and-get-pregnant-so-we can-be-cool school, this is revolutionary. So revolutionary, in fact, it dominated all intelligent conversation for the remainder of the afternoon.

In Spanish class, my fellow overly-ambitious classmates discussed why it is impossible to not like pie. There are so many different kinds! You can't just "not like" pie in general. It's a sin. A couple of classmates and myself began listing all of the different kinds of pie that there are. Our teacher started to get mildly annoyed at us and looked like she was about to throw a text book at me. Teachers, heh, they seem to get so cranky when you disrupt a test review to talk about pie. I'm telling you, there's just no imagination in people these days...

Because of the startling amount of wit and knowledge that I have aquired while attending let's-smoke-pot-and-get-pregnant-so-we-can-be-cool school, I quickly came up with win-win solution. We could continue to discuss pie's delicious variability in Spanish! Plus, it couldn't hurt to incorporate it into our readings. There's nothing like a good class discussion to increase the I.Q. of a classroom.

Me gusta el pastel:

1. el pastel de manzanas
2. el pastel de limones
3. el pastel de limonada
4. el pastel de papas
5. el pastel de cebollas
6. el pastel de guacomole
7. el pastel de pelo
8. el pastel de gato
9. el pastel de cafetero
10. el pastel de vaca